Hmm, I’m not quite sure what to say. I’ve started this journal entry a few times already and now have just decided to stop trying to be eloquent and instead just write. On Saturday night I flew back to Wisconsin from Guatemala with my good friend Scott. We were with a group doing some relief work. As always I returned home with grand plans of somehow incorporating more Guatemala into my life. Maybe one day.
I will say, that it has been good to be home. I’ve missed playing music. I’m so thankful to be doing what I’m doing in life. Recently I’ve been so afraid of losing what I have. The beauty and joys are slightly tainted by my fear. Why? What really do I have to fear?
Yesterday I met a lady named Phyllis. After exchanging a few cordial sentences she asked me what I would like prayer for. I gave her no specifics and she proceeded to pray that I would know God’s perfect love and have no fear, for perfect love casts out fear. I really wish I never had fear again. I wish I never missed out on being thankful again. I so want to trust in God’s perfect love each moment. Without Him and His love, I do find myself in a frenzy and honestly that is just not the way to live. There are way too many good things to be enjoyed; like good friends and food and music and lightning that lights up the sky and family. Tonight, Scott, Hoss, and I all went to the grocery store. We bought some smoked salmon, rye bread, fresh tarragon, and stone ground mustard and Scott put together some delicious little morsels that we did eat:) I’m looking forward to some more tomorrow. hmm